Tag Archives: tipping

Top 5 Things That Unsettle Me

1- Foreign pronunciation. Do you pronounce the word correctly and risk sounding like a pompous prick? Or do you go with the general pronunciation and risk sounding like an uneducated plebe? I never know what to do!
(common offenders: Cap-ri or Cuhpri, Lou-vre or Louve, VUI-tton or Vatahn)

2- Oxford commas. So apparently, these are not necessary in our modern age…but I still heart them! I’ve tried to switch over but just can’t commit. I love that little guy.

3- Carry-on measurements. Does anyone’s bag actually fit in those little metal boxes? Doubtful. My advice is to walk past swiftly and determined…once you get past security you’re clear! They can make you gate-check but it won’t cost you anything, huzzah!

4- Tipping at semi-self-serve places. So I ordered, picked up my food, and fixed my own drink…but you cleared away the dishes. What is the appropriate protocol here?!

5- Asking for ranch dressing. God knows I love it…but no doubt the server is judging. Also, as sweet as it can be, the southern accent does nothing for the word “ranch.”

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Top 5 Ways You Know You’ve Made It

1- You take taxis whenever the feeling strikes. Don’t feeling like walking in sub-zero temps to the closest L train? Hail a cab! Not in the mood to stare at a stranger’s crotch on a packed subway ride? You don’t have to! Oh how I dream of this day…

2- You no longer stress over the tip/service ratio. Did she REALLY deserve 25% for that mediocre service? After all, those extra two bucks could buy you a morning coffee next week…but what if someone is watching? Scheisse.

3- You never, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever have to stay in a hostel again. Suc-cess!!

4- You shop in a posh food market. Notice how I didn’t say grocery store? Organic lollipops for all!

5- You own a Burberry trench.  **Note: This is my own personal yard stick of progress.

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