Tag Archives: success

Top 5 Reasons I Need To Make It Big

1- I really, really love jewels and gemstones. So much it hurts. With that said—most occupations frown upon, say my new antique rhinestone watch, as everyday attire. Hmph.

2- I don’t like maneuvering with the masses. Under most circumstances, you couldn’t pay me to go to a stadium-filled concert (Dolly excluded, obv)…but I still like to partake in the fun. Private concert at Versailles anyone? 

3- Sometimes, weekly manicures are the only thing that makes the world tolerable. 

4- I want to be able to wear what I want, where I want, at any time I want. In other words, caftans and diamonds all day/err day.

5- I would do really nice things. Charitable things. I’ve already gotten my platforms figured out actually, just in case you’re wondering. 

 

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Top 5 Rules of Nature

1- No matter how powerful/successful you are, you are nothing compared to the entity that brings about hurricanes, tornados, tsunamis, etc…so don’t get too big for your britches.

2- Darwinism is alive and real…so going swimming after that fifth beer is not the greatest idea.

3- If you don’t know what it is, don’t touch it.

4- When drawing attention to yourself for mating purposes, make sure you’re not also attracting dangerous predators.

5- Be capable of fighting and/or flighting…otherwise your lifespan doesn’t look that promising.

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Top 5 Things I Can’t Wait To Say

1- Which looks better with this outfit? The Louboutin or the Jimmy Choo?

2- So glad have to have you in New York, feel free to put your things in the guest bedroom.

3- How in the world did you manage to find a diamond that size?!

4- I just LOVE spin class! It really wakes me up in the morning!

5- …and that’s how I made my first million.

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Top 5 Ways You Know You’ve Made It

1- You take taxis whenever the feeling strikes. Don’t feeling like walking in sub-zero temps to the closest L train? Hail a cab! Not in the mood to stare at a stranger’s crotch on a packed subway ride? You don’t have to! Oh how I dream of this day…

2- You no longer stress over the tip/service ratio. Did she REALLY deserve 25% for that mediocre service? After all, those extra two bucks could buy you a morning coffee next week…but what if someone is watching? Scheisse.

3- You never, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever have to stay in a hostel again. Suc-cess!!

4- You shop in a posh food market. Notice how I didn’t say grocery store? Organic lollipops for all!

5- You own a Burberry trench.  **Note: This is my own personal yard stick of progress.

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