Tag Archives: social

Top 5 People I Don’t Understand

1- Gym rats that fit in an extra session at lunch. While I admire the dedication, what do you do with your hair? How do you have time to shower? Do you not feel gross the rest of the afternoon? How does this work??

2- Shoppers who must buy the outfit as displayed on the mannequin. Where’s the creativity? The personal touch? Aren’t you afraid you’ll run into someone dressed the exact same way as you? The horror!

3- Moviegoers who feel the need to talk during a film. It’s not okay and everyone hates you.

4- Parents who give in to tantrums and expect that to fix the problem. Congratulations, you just won 17 more years of brattiness. Was that extra toy really worth it?

5- Worrywarts who torture themselves with coulda, woulda, shoulda. It’s over. If you can’t change what happened, you might as well accept it and get on with your bad self. Next!

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Top 5 Reasons I’m Not A Birthday-Hater

1- Each year inevitably brings about new knowledge. For instance, this year I learned that bier/fanta is an oddly amazing combination. Who knew? 

2- You pick the restaurant and no one can say a damn thing about it. Load up ya’ll, we’re going to Bojangles! 

3- It’s the most exciting day on Facebook, hands down.

4- There will be cake. 

5- It means you’re alive, silly. So much better than the alternative.

***Note: Today is my birthday!! Here’s to another wildly unpredictable year.

 

 

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