Tag Archives: nature

Top 5 Rules of Nature

1- No matter how powerful/successful you are, you are nothing compared to the entity that brings about hurricanes, tornados, tsunamis, etc…so don’t get too big for your britches.

2- Darwinism is alive and real…so going swimming after that fifth beer is not the greatest idea.

3- If you don’t know what it is, don’t touch it.

4- When drawing attention to yourself for mating purposes, make sure you’re not also attracting dangerous predators.

5- Be capable of fighting and/or flighting…otherwise your lifespan doesn’t look that promising.

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Top 5 Reasons You Should Go To The Beach

1- The frizzier the hair, the more fun you’re having.

2- You get to show off your masterful self-tanning skills…which is no small feat. 

3- Heels are frowned upon, so now’s the chance to give your worn out arches a break.

4- It’s the perfect excuse to eat shrimp every.single.night. Shrimp-kabobs, shrimp creole, shrimp gumbo. Pan-fried, deep fried, stir-fried. There’s pineapple shrimp, lemon shrimp, coconut shrimp, pepper shrimp, shrimp soup…

5- It’s good for your soul, fool! Now hit the road.

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