Tag Archives: Jersey

Top 5 Commuters Who Should Just Disappear

1- The a-hole who sits spread eagle with his (already large) frame. Usually seen taking up 3/4 of the only available bench. Go you-know-what yourself dude.

2- The panicky rico suave who freaks if someone steps on his precious shoes. If they were that nice, you wouldn’t be on the train…mmmk?

3- Anyone who eats anything remotely resembling food. It’s like watching someone eat in the bathroom…Heebiejeebies.

4- The Metrocard fumbler…I don’t care if you have to duck under the turnstile, when that train is coming you better MOVE son!

5- The perv. There’s one on every train and it never gets less awkward or creepy. Blegh!

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Top 5 Styles I Just Can’t Support

1- The one-shoulder trend. First of all, it is rarely flattering. Second of all, it just screams Miami/RHONJ/Jersey Shore to me.

2- Mini-backpacks. Nothing can ever top the Mickey Mouse one I had in 1994.

3- Toms. I love the cause, but can they pleeeaaaasseee come up with a more attractive style?!

4- Logos. I don’t care if it’s a $1400 Vuitton bag or a $300 Coach tote. I think it’s tacky. 

5- Lucite. It just reminds me of small-town pageants (that I may or may not have participated in back in the day…shhh).

 

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