Tag Archives: exercise

Top 5 Slippery Slopes of Life

1- Dating your ex. True, this one is kind of obvious…but all too commonplace, nonetheless!! There was a reason it didn’t work. Recycle your paper goods not your bad decisions.

2. Buying yoga pants. Chances are, these will very rarely see a half lotus…and their flexible waistbands will ironically lessen the need for physical fitness. Real pants miss you.

3. French fries. Next step: salt, ketchup, ranch, cheese, bacon bits…just pick your poison.

4. Credit cards. They exist for a reason and it’s most certainly not to make your life easier.

5. Social media. A quick check here and there=great. Instagramming each meal=annoying. See life through your real eyes…not through the feedback of others, yo.

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Top 5 Things You Should Just Forget About

1- Getting a decent parking spot on any college campus. In related news, don’t even try to park illegally…fifty bucks says there is a parking services agent hiding in the bushes. 

2- Wearing your hair down in this heat. Don’t lie girl, you know that ‘do is gonna be in a topknot before you even make it to the subway.

3- Waking up early to work out on the weekend. I’ve told myself this was going to happen, oh, a few THOUSAND times in my life…and I’ve never done it once.

4- Acting funny, witty, smooth, or refined when needed. Sorry player, this is going to be the EXACT moment you knock over your glass and/or get a piece of basil stuck in your teeth.

5- Choosing the “right” line in security. It’s always a gamble…and I inevitably get stuck behind the newb who forgets to take out his laptop…way to hold up the entire.freaking.line. dude…

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Top 5 Reasons I Watch Tennis

1- As far as sports go, it’s one of the few I can actually see myself playing.

2- While not entirely unrelated to the statement above, the outfits can be super cute.

3- Rafael Nadal. Ay Caramba.

4- It’s great background noise…not that distracting and almost always dignified.

5- The arms…oh the arms. Talk about inspiration!

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Top 5 Things I Hope You Know

1- That “alot” is not a word. Never has been. We had a lot of fun at the birthday bash…see what I did there? It’s called a space bar.

2- That you stand on the right side of the escalator (and allow people to walk past you on the left). Passports should be revoked for breaking this international rule of conduct.

3- That prescriptions are what you take to over-medicate yourself for ADD, OCD, or whatever the latest condition is to hit the market. Subscriptions are for magazines. 

4- That reading something does not make it true. Investigate so you don’t look like a dumbass. ***Particularly useful when relating to Facebook “Shares” (hint: check out snopes.com).

5- That food matters…so try everyday to make good choices! Don’t turn your temple into a trash dump.

 

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Top 5 Things I Can’t Wait To Say

1- Which looks better with this outfit? The Louboutin or the Jimmy Choo?

2- So glad have to have you in New York, feel free to put your things in the guest bedroom.

3- How in the world did you manage to find a diamond that size?!

4- I just LOVE spin class! It really wakes me up in the morning!

5- …and that’s how I made my first million.

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Top 5 Things That Are NOT Best in Moderation

1- Pomegranates. Pom season doesn’t last very long…so indulge, indulge, indulge. Just make sure you’re not wearing white/around anyone towards whom you have romantic inclinations…that sh&% is not pretty [but tastes so good!].

2- Travel. The more you go, the more you know! As the over-pinned quote states, “Travel is the only thing you buy that makes you richer.”

3- Reading. Not only is it an extremely rewarding and interesting activity, it also teaches you how to SPELL!

4- Laughter. Do whatever it takes to get this in EVERY DAY. For me, it’s ridiculous memes online…but for you it might be The Daily Show or Kardashian Kouture.

5- Walking. Did you know that Manhattan is only 13.4 miles long and 2.3 miles wide? That taxi to Sunday Brunch *might* not be necessary.

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Top 5 Reasons May Is The Best Month Zeus Ever Created

1- April showers bring what you ask? MAY FLOWERS BIATCH!!! Everyone loves a good flower.

2- Memorial Weekend is the unofficial start of summer…and one of heaven’s greatest gifts: Summer Hours. For those of you who don’t live on the tiny universe of Manhattan, “Summer Hours” are NYC’s way of making up for crappy winter weather and the L train. We straight up get off of work early every.single.friday during this glorious season. Booyah.

3- It marks the birth of one of the nation’s greatest social commentators (me, obviously).

4- There are no puffer jackets in sight.

5- No matter what, you know that you have at least three solid months of good weather in your future (which means at least TWO months to get ready for bikini season…amirite?).

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Top 5 Ways To Turn Around A Craptastic Day

1- If the weather is nice, go to the store and purchase your most favorite mag. Next, pick a cute little restaurant, sit outside, and have a great meal while you read the magazine front-back. It’s the perfect way to de-stress!

2-  Choose your favorite artist (or buy the new record you’ve been wanting) and turn it on while you take a long, relaxing bath. Extra points if you exfoliate.

3- Go to the gym and rock out to hardcore rock/rap. You’ll be ready to kick some ass in no time.

4- Order your favorite delivery and have a DVR party for one. However, limit yourself to three episodes…more than that and you just start to feel worse.

5- If all else fails, call your mom.

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Top 5 Items Worth The Splurge

1- Pricey concealer. The drug store liquid stuff is absolutely worthless, while better brands can completely transform your face.

2- A beautiful winter coat. First of all, you wear one almost every day in the most loathsome of seasons…pick something that will cheer you up! In addition, people rarely see the outfit below.

3- Sneakers. Anything that will encourage you (i.e. me) to work out more is worth it…plus custom sneaks are better for your heels, arches, ankles, etc.

4- A nice watch. It just makes you feel fancy…and it gives a good impression at the office.

5- Luxe lingerie. The last place you want to look cheap is the bedroom.

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Top 5 Things You Should Stop Doing

1- Placidly standing on the left side of the escalator. That is for the right side. The left side is for people with places to go!! If you get pushed down or punched one day, don’t say I didn’t warn you.

2- Commenting back (individually) to everyone that compliments your new profile pic. While you may think you’re only being polite, it looks a little self-involved and desperate. A simple “Thanks Guys!” should suffice.

3- Running at the gym. Go outside! It’s a tougher workout and you get that VD!

(Vitamin D…what were you thinking?!)

4- Showering with your bf’s soap/shampoo/conditioner all-in-one. It smells awful and is everything/nothing at the same time.

5- Misspelling third grade words. The world notices and hates you for it. 

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