Tag Archives: brunch

Top 5 Things That Always Seem Suspect

1- The “traffic was terrible/train was delayed/accident on the highway” excuse. Most of us have used this one at some point in our lives…thus no one actually believes it.

2- The sickeningly sweet “do you want to save 10% today?!” request from retailers. Listen sir/madam, I know you don’t care two licks about my savings. What you do care about is meeting your credit card sign-up quota…and frankly, that’s none of my concern.

3- The “unlimited mimosas” trend at local brunch spots. How does this even work?? Does the restaurant not take a beating in profits?? Surely there’s a trick in here somewhere.

4- Any child/teenager that washes your car for no apparent reason. Might wanna go ahead and brace yourself.

5- When a person under the age of 40 goes through and “likes” all of your profile pics. To quote Mariah, why you so obsessed with me?!

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Top 5 Urban Legends That Still Freak Me Out

1- The Killer in the Backseat. I have this tall tale to thank for my compulsive (compulsive) need to keep doors locked. Don’t believe me? Ask my friends who get annoyed with the constant  “Hey, do you mind locking your door” request.

2- Lights Out Gang Initiations. You all know the story…a group of wannabe gang members drive around at night without their headlights on until some kind citizen flashes his/her lights as a warning signal. The gang then chases aforementioned citizen down for kicks and giggles. Um, terrifying. 

3- The Man Upstairs. As a babysitter extraordinaire, this one just hits too close to home. I prefer Jamie Lee Curtis in Freaky Friday.

4- Light as a feather, stiff as a board. My mom swears she and her cousin lifted my grandfather doing this trick…and I want no part of it.

5- Bloody Mary. Not gonna hear me utter those words three times in a row. Thank heavens I prefer mimosas at brunch!

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