Tag Archives: breakfast

Top 5 Signs You Should Chill The F Out

1- You choose cubed ice rather than crushed because it takes less time…even though you prefer crushed.

2- You have given up and replaced milk with coffee when having your morning cereal…because it just seems more efficient.

3- You put your emergency blinkers on and drive like a convict when traffic pisses you off…and have been known to pull this move en route to the grocery store.

4- You get violently angry when people attempt to read to you aloud. 

5- You feel the need to label where the forks, knives, and spoons go in the kitchen drawer…because, ya know, we couldn’t figure that one out ourselves.

 

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Top 5 (Reasonably Harmless) Things That Make Me Want To Rage

1- Restaurants that do not offer wi-fi…I mean, wtf. It’s the 21st century. Join the real world people (I’m talking to you, Europe).

2- Commercials on Pandora. I get it—that’s how they pay their bills—but I’m in the middle of a workout and the only thing getting me through it is picturing Adam Levine singing only to me…shirtless.

3- When a screwdriver is needed to change a freaking battery. Might as well throw the offending item away.

4- When I’m forced (yet again) to buy another $10 Metrocard because I left my (fully paid) one at home. *#*&!@#*!@#&!@#&!@#*!!!

5- When I pour a perfectly delicious bowl of cereal…and realize there’s no milk. So, so sad.
 

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